The Neil Diamond paper dolls issue also featured this staff-created digital photo illustration of Neil looking like he’s taking over Ontario.
Next month I’ll be moving to a new desk in the office, so I started to clear out the amazing things I’ve acquired over the 6-plus years I’ve been at The Press-Enterprise.
One of the things I encountered was one of the early issues of the Guide when we went from the pull-out smaller section to the full broadsheet (the bigger section like the rest of the paper). When we were making the transition, we were able to do a lot of ambitious things, like create Neil Diamond paper dolls as a Guide cover story back in January 2009 when he first performed at the then months-old Citizens Business Bank Arena in Ontario.
I had this wild idea that we should create Neil Diamond paper dolls with all of his fashion over the years and my boss let me do it. It was in the fun, sometimes snarky spirit of the Guide and to this day, when one of us on the Guide staff has a wacky non-traditional story idea, we still call it “paper dolls” (ah, my legacy).
A photo of a January 2009 Guide cover story that featured paper dolls of Neil Diamond.
So, along with the actual paper dolls, I somehow convinced my editor to let me rewrite the lyrics to “America” to fit with his Diamond’s tour date and the fact that the Inland Empire was finally growing as an entertainment stop for major performers.
When I Instagrammed a photo of the paper dolls cover and mentioned the lyrics earlier, a couple of folks messaged me about sharing them. So, here they are.
Far
We’ve been traveling far
To see a show
To LA to see stars
Close
Only want to be close
We want to drive
Somewhere close to home
On his tour through the states
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Hopefully he’ll be back again
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Neil
You don’t seem so far away
Oh with traveling lights today
Please wear a sequined shirt
Please wear a sequined shirt
Neil
You have been a chameleon
Shining brighter than a neon
Oh those hot August nights
Oh those hot August nights
On a tour around the world
Neil’s coming to Ontario
He’ll see all the boys and girls
Neil’s coming to Ontario
He will play “Sweet Caroline”
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Perhaps even “Red, Red Wine”
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Neil’s coming to Ontario
Sunday, Sunday
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday
Play man of solitary (Sunday)
And Crack-a-lin’ Rosie (Sunday)
Of Neil I sing (Sunday)
Of Neil I sing
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday
And just for fun, here’s the original Neil Diamond version.
Also, that Neil Diamond show that I previewed at Citizens Business Bank Arena was one of the greatest shows I’ve ever seen.